On December 24, 2014, we had a huge reason to celebrate.
Sure Christmas was the next day and we were going to surprise your nanna and poppy but that’s the day we found out that you were in your mummy’s belly Gumnut.
Your mum went to the doctors to make sure everything was OK with both of you and we were told that you were here already, weeks before we found out.
I couldn’t describe the many emotions that we were experiencing. It was all good, though if I were being honest with you, there was a little bit of fear and worry intermingled in between the joy and excitement. It was the usual fears/worries that most parents experienced I suppose, nothing that I/we were dwelling on.
We didn’t share the good news with a lot of people and initially, only your grandparents and aunts and uncles new but as time went on, close friends were able to share in our joy.
We were really looking forward to September 2, 2015 because we were told that’s when we’d get to see you face to face.
I was looking forward to holding you in my arms and longing to do a better job with you than I did with your older brother when he first came home.
I was looking forward to the long sleepless nights and wondering how your mom and I would manage taking care of you and your big brother.
I was looking forward to you and your big brother getting to know each other and becoming best friends.
I was looking forward to a lot of a things.
I was dreaming like any dad would.
While our love for you cannot be easily put into words, God’s love for you is unfathomable and indescribable. I suppose the best way of expressing that is by telling you how Jesus died for you, long before you would even come into this world.
In the end, it is that immense love God has for you, that could likely be the reason why He decided that you wouldn’t get to spend time with us here on Earth.
On February 3, 2015, when your mom had gone to the hospital to put some concerns to rest, we were heartbroken to find out that you had left us and gone home to be with the LORD.
For reasons that God alone knows, we were told that your little heart was not beating anymore.
Did you see me breakdown and cry out in agony? Even as I write these words, fresh tears are flowing for you my dear Gumnut.
Our excitement and joy had turned to mourning and sorrow.
Though we never got to see you and hold you and cuddle you, you were as real to us as your older brother.
The moment you began to grow in your mummy’s belly, you become a person of immeasurable worth and value, a child of the LORD Almighty.
Your mom and I are not angry at God, we are just very sad.
God has been good to us in reminding us that we will get to see you again one day.
You are now with Jesus, surely having a wonderful time, because there is no better place than Heaven.
We just have to be patient and wait till we get to see you and make up for lost time.
In the meantime, we have your big brother to love, look after and care for.
When I now look at your big brother, I see you too so don’t you think daddy is going to forget you.
I look forward to the day when I will get to see you.
I miss you very much.
I love you Gumnut.
Thank Sri 🙂